i have been...

feeling an incredible sense of peace with my life recently. contentment being not simply a word, but more a bonafide feeling. i like that, this sense that i am exactly where i am meant to be, doing precisely what i'm supposed to be doing. right now, today. i'm not reaching, trying to grab the higher spot on the monkey bars. the view is mighty fine from my perch on life's jungle gym. i have what i need. i want for nothing.

i'm getting lots of exercise, fresh air and clean food. i have the company of a good man to share my life. my children are healthy, fully functioning adults who for all practical appearances seriously seem to have their shit together. and they like each other. a lot. me too, and the huz. and those babies - my little grandbeans. having them leaves me feeling sorry for those without. grandchildren, that is. my little family's pretty tightly knit, a blessing i hold in high regard. i have good, good friends and i realize how lucky i am to be held in their countenance.

above all else though, i have peace. one can only understand how vital inner peace is when one is without it. it's painful. i don't ever want to experience life without it again. i'll do whatever it takes to maintain and secure peace in my life. with peace there is freedom. freedom to trust, live honestly, and feel safe.

and i'm writing. not here so much lately (though i miss it, think of it each day, and really want to do better about posting more regularly) but on my own, in the morning, at night, whenever i get the chance. i've taken to carrying a notebook around with me, not leaving home without it. i'm collecting pictures, jotting phrases, making note of new words, unique names, anything of interest that sparks my imagination. these days i think in stories and in doing so i feel as if i come home after an overly long absence. my stories never end, but go on day and night, switching directions like the springtime winds blowing color and life onto the page.

deep post. what did you expect after my having been gone so long? oh, and i have you. reading along whenever i post. for one who so loves to write, there is no greater blessing than to know that someone is reading.

wishing you peace and love on an unseasonably cold morning

a morning to stay tucked in reading

a morning to stay tucked in writing...

-t.

~this, my dear nans, is what i've been up to~